I am bored. Its a long and boring day. One liners are here to help me.
Some of the best ones I came across today:

Rehab is for quitters.
When in doubt, empty the magazine.
When you don’t know what you are doing, do it neatly.
No good deed goes unpunished.
If you understand what you’re doing, you’re not learning anything.
Better late than really late.
If you try and don’t succeed, cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie.
A conclusion is simply the place where you got tired of thinking.
First rule of acting: whatever happens, look as if it were intended.
As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools.
Depression is merely anger without the enthusiasm.
Everyone is beautiful if you squint a bit.
I am willing to make the mistakes if someone else is willing to learn from them.
How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you’re on.
I don’t mind coming to work, but that eight hour wait to go home is a bitch!
I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.

More can be found at: Vegard